Pressure Is An Inside Job
When I was preparing for a mastermind group recently, I read a phrase that hit so close to home, that I almost fell off my chair. The words pretty much did a cartoon-like bounce off the page, and landed back with a flash of dynamite. The phrase read, “Pressure is one’s own creation.” Wow!
To be honest, I felt a bit angry, frustrated and just plain annoyed. Was this statement suggesting that I was personally responsible for every ounce of pressure that I ever felt? I understood how I created my own pressure when overcommitting to plans and having to move or cancel calls. It also made sense for when I would feel a touch of nerves stepping out to meet a first date, this was all self imposed pressure.
But I asked myself, what about in my professional life, when I had dozens of emails marked urgent before 9am, or an endlessly growing to-do list that seemed to just get longer. What about those months when I was working on a team project at my “9-infinity” job, putting in 100+ hours a week, hardly sleeping, hardly eating and prepping for, what I was told, the most important pitch the agency would ever have. Where was the pressure coming from then? Was this phrase suggesting that I was in fact creating that internal pressure for myself? In my mind it just had to be someone else putting that type of pressure on me, as I could never understand choosing that for myself. Can you relate?
I went to sleep that night getting curious why this phrase was so triggering. So I got out my detective lens and started to break it down to understand: if pressure is really one’s own creation, what can we do to alleviate it?
Pressure Point #1:
Remind yourself that you’re the one in the drivers seat.
It was me that said yes to this job and therefor also could leave it too, I was opting to work under tight deadlines and kept saying yes to a role that even though it was fun and creative, had high levels of pressure built in. Reminding myself that I had choice was a powerful moment.Pressure Point #2:
Naming, setting and upholding our own boundaries is key.
It was my responsibility to set boundaries that worked for me and to share those with my team. Having murky boundaries or not communicating them will absolutely lead to undo pressure and people not knowing that you’ve reached your limit. Boundaries are an art, not a science. It takes time to learn about your own personal boundaries and implement them. If this is a hot topic, I invite you to start getting curious about how boundaries, or the lack of them, are impacting your life.Pressure Point #3:
Perfection is unattainable.
Admittedly, I’m a recovering perfectionist! I was the only one truly demanding the highest quality “perfection” from myself and my team, so let’s just call that what it is, unnecessary pressure! Doing work I’m proud of has always been a high value of mine, but doing work I’m proud of and doing work that’s “perfect” are two different things. When perfection is the ultimate goal, the pressure will always keep building.Pressure Point #4:
Creating sustainability includes knowing you have options.
I was the one believing that working harder was the only option, but let me tell you, there are always other ways. Running a marathon day after day isn’t sustainable for your body and isn’t sustainable for your mind either.Pressure Point #5:
Not all energy is created equal.
I believed that pressure made the work good. Have you ever felt that you do your best work when you’re under pressure? This kind of stress has a name, it’s called catabolic energy and it’s the same energy that would give you a burst of adrenaline if you were running away from a tiger. It’s a draining, forcing, resisting type of energy that releases stress hormones in our brain and is built to create pressure. There are so many other ways to generate flowing, light and inspired types of energy and work.
With a slight perspective shift and understanding your own personal pressure points, a situation can go from overwhelm to opportunity. Where in your life have you felt extreme pressure? Where did it come from and what’s your responsibility in creating it? If you're needing some extra support with feelings of pressure, feel free to reach out and let's connect.
Quote of the week:
“All pressure is self-inflicted. It's what you make of it or how you let it rub off on you.”
- Sebastian Coe
With ♡ and gratitude,
Jennifer